Thursday, February 24, 2005

Lawyers Suck ... I Should Know, I Am One!!!

I thought this would be fun ... lawyer jokes. The funny thing is most of my friends are lawyers, and guess what? They love lawyer jokes more than anyone ... so if you've got any, throw 'em at me:

What's the difference between a lawyer and a hooker?
The hooker will stop fucking you once you're dead.

Two lawyers are walking along the beach in Florida when they spot a nude blonde model drowning. Both of the lawyers decide to be chivalrous and swim out to rescue her. When they get her back to the shore, they notice she has since passed out. The first lawyer looks at his buddy and says, "Hey, let's screw her!!" The second lawyer asks, "Out of what?"

Did you hear about the lawyer who would get turned on by the law?
He got off on a technicality.

I know these are terrible, but if you've got more, post 'em in the comments.


TheGreenKnight said...

Not a joke, but a true story: My wife and I know a guy who's a lawyer. When we decided to ask him to be our attorney, the conversation opened like this:

My wife: "So, Jim, you know any good lawyers?"

Jim: "Nope. Only competent but evil ones!"

mariposatomica said...

I'm sending these jokes to my brother he'll get a kick out of them. As soon as he sends me some jokes I will post them.

Anonymous said...

Lawyers are a virus with shoes. Now don't get the wrong idea, I have nothing against lawyers,I think everyone should own two. One to s__t one and the other one to wipe your ass with.