The Devil Returns

Sorry I haven't posted much this week. This was a lousy week. I am in the last stages of one of those colds that lingers on and off every other day; you feel fine one day but the next it returns. I had to leave work on Tuesday and have spent the past few days alternating between sleeping and taking any kind of cold medicine I could get my grubby little hands on. I probably have enough drugs in my body right now to put down a horse.

To top it off, I hate my ISP provider. They claim I didn't pay my bill last month. So I call their "assistance" or "help line" or "customer service" to bitch about this. There is simply no way this should happen because I have that direct pay thing where they debit my checking account every month for my payment. So I call them up and they say that the company that does the debit is having problems with any account from my bank (another sore subject there). Now, my ISP is using a new provider who will use my check card instead. So in the meantime, I am relegated to their dial up service for about 10 days through no fault of my own. To make up for it, my ISP says they'll upgrade me to their "professional" capacity for free because of all of this shit, which leads me to wonder why I didn't know about "professional" capacity in the first place!!! I have a feeling "professional" doesn't really mean anything, just another excuse for their ineptitude.

On a different note, I did notice that during daytime TV there are basically 3 types of commercials that run ad nauseam ......

• Debt consolidation or the lump sum services: Either you get the commercial for consolidating your debts or you get this company that says they'll take any future awards you might have coming from a lawsuit, settlement, or lottery and give you one large lump sum. Guess I wasn't aware so many lottery winners were home during the day!!
• Law firm commercials: We all love these, with the local backbreaker law firm that has some sort of catchy logo or mascot to get you to call them. Some of the mascots I've seen are tigers, bulldogs, and even a cranky old insurance settlement agent who inevitably ends up getting blown up, electricuted, or burned up somehow.
• Vocational/Technical colleges: These seem to be the most popular. It's always about some local "college" that offers training for physician's assistants, paralegals, or those damn ITT commercials with the real life testimonials from people who are obviously reading from cue cards.

These commercials run incessantly between my talk shows. Springer has really gotten lousy lately because all they do is the "I'm a man dressed like a woman" or "I'm sleeping with your man" episodes. Oh how I long for the days of the KKK Thanksgiving meals with guests from the Guardian Angels and the Black Panthers. Maury still keeps me intrigued with the "Who my baby daddy?" episodes (I did type it correctly; I was trying to show my street cred there .. lol). Of course, the Price Is Right is still awesome as ever as well as Judge Mathis, who actually used the phrase "ghettofabulous" in an episode. If I ever run for office as a judge, I would totally be like Judge Mathis referring to some of the plaintiffs or defendants as "babygirl" or "slick" or "playa" ... lol. Well, the Devil is back and I'm sure I'll have more to rant/rave/bitch about as time goes on!! Good to be back!!