Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Bachelor/ette Shopping At The Supermarket

Grocery shopping sucks. Not just for the obvious reason that you're spending money, but it's the whole atmosphere of the grocery store. Everytime I hit my local Meijers, there are the abundance of couples going through the store together. They're discussing what needs to be bought, what they have enough of, and what can wait until the next trip. There I am buying the bachelor's rations of frozen meals, frozen pizzas, a 12 pack of soda, and the 1/2 gallon of milk. Talk about someplace that really makes you realize you're truly single!!

Then there are the families. Mom with the 3 kids, who are running up and down every aisle, pulling at this and that. Dad is off looking at the beer or didn't even bother to go. Mini-vans clog the parking lot ensuring that any traffic in or near the supermarket will run slowly or not at all. And forget the check out ... the lady in front of me with the 2 kids will have her basket loaded with about $200 worth of stuff.

Now, let's turn to the single guy/gal at the market. A much different set of rules applies here. No, I'm not going to load a grocery cart with $200 of stuff (unless I'm buying a keg for a party; even that is only about $70). No, I'm not blocking the aisle with both my cart and 2 kids. No, I'm not going to look at every gallon of milk to find the "magic" date that will ensure the milk will keep longer than the others. No, I'm not going to raise hell with store management because the green beans that were advertised at .39 cents are sold out and the only ones available are .45 cents a can. No, I'm not going through the self check out with 30 items. No, I'm not going to go through every single apple in the bin to find the 4 that I want.

There should be a bachelorette/bachelor line at the grocery store. You either have to pay cash or plastic. There would be an item limit (say less than 20). The aisle would barely be wide enough for the carts to ensure that some housewife doesn't try to slip in with her 5 kids. There would also be a limit that you could only buy what you carry out in bags (this would further keep the families out of our convenient line).

All of this stems from all the times that I've been grocery shopping and have encountered every single one of these problems. The milk maids (see the movie Clerks for this one), the kids running up and down the aisles (I've had more than one run into me as he/she turned the corner), the mini-vans parked in the middle of parking aisles instead of just pulling into a spot and waiting, the long lines behind parents buying the entire store in the less than 20 items aisle when I have only 4 items. I understand that these are some of the things that families go through with kids and I do hope to have my own. I only hope I can be a bit more considerant and have my kids on a tighter leash (literally, I could use a leash) ... LOL


cammie said...

okay when me and mr good guy go to the grocery store i am like a bullet...cause i have to finish my shopping by the time he gets to the beer isle, picks the case he wants and then comes and finds me, cause the next thing out of his mouth is "are we dont yet?" and i always carry all the bags in at once, even if my arms go numb before i get to the door and i have to carry several things in my teeth.

NML said...

I always go to the express lane. No time for grannies and kids!