Monday, June 13, 2005

I Never ....

In addition to the many festivities that went on Saturday, we whipped out the classic drinking game "I Never". You can always count on this game for a few good laughs and getting to know your friends. The rules are simple: One person will start off with a statement, for example, "I never kissed a member of the opposite sex". Now, if you have committed the statement, you must drink. It's a little counterintuitive, but fun. We played this many a drunken night out at a pub, but being drunk you don't quit remember which of your friends has committed those unholy acts that might land them in jail in 22 of the 50 states.

So in the spirit of the game, I've listed some "I've nevers ...." which I actually have not done to this point in my life.

I HAVE NEVER .....
1. smoked a cigarette in my life.
2. been arrested.
3. kissed a member of the same sex (except for my grandfather ... on the cheek, ya pervs)
4. gotten a tatto
5. finished reading Don Quixote.
6. grown my hair long
7. done any drugs
8. finished learning to play the guitar
9. handcuffed or been handcuffed during sex (pretty dull for the Devil)
10. filmed any sexual activity
11. eaten lobster, Ethiopian food, French food, chitlins, calf fries/Rocky mountain oysters, head cheese, or tongue.
12. felt comfortable around any girlfriend's parents
13. liked any picture of me
14. believed the old saying "Money can't buy you happiness" (I believe that's just an adage perpetrated by the rich so that you'll think you'll be content with what you have while they continue to pillage the world)
15. been to mainland Europe (visited Ireland and stopped over in Sicily on the way to Saudi Arabia)
16. had major surgery or broken a bone (knock on wood)
17. believed in superstitions
18. been truly happy with any aspect of my life
19. really finished any list I've started


Calvin and Hobbes: The only tatto I ever seriously considered getting

So now you tell me some of the "I Nevers ... " in your life as well. Feel free to comment!!

11 comments:

yournamehere said...

Calvin and Hobbes was my all time favorite comic. It pisses me off that rednecks who could in no way appreciate the nuances of the strip have co-opted Calvin and have him pissing on Ford logos and Jeff Gordon's car number.

NML said...

I'll give you 5

1) I have never eaten snails or any of that funky black foos they have in the US like chitlins and collard greens (not even sure if I spelt that right)
2) ..been arrested
3)...finished Jane Eyre
4)...never broken a bone
5)...had a boyfriend break it off with me. They acted like such dicks I got in there first ;-)

Elenamary said...

of your whole list I've done all of them except for four...not telling you which four.

Ruben said...

My list of "I Never's" is pretty small. I think I should run screaming from the room now.

Cincysundevil said...

YNH-
Nothing good or pure can last. There will always be some corporate whore or idiot there to ruin things. Now they have Calvin praying in front of a cross ... what next? Calvin burning the Quaran to appease the Christian right?
NML-
When I hit the UK, I'm totally bringing you some chittlins; getting you drunk and thrown in jail; the Cliff Notes of Jane Eyre but I won't break a bone or break it off with ya!
Elenamary-
I'm guessing 2, 4, 9, 10 (I know you've never gotten a tatto because you're getting one in Mexico)
Ruben-
Good for you! You'll regret what you didn't do more than what you have done always.

MoDigli said...

I never!!! Oh, memories.
this game usually leads to at least one hook-up within the group of players. The conversation always leads to what you have or haven't done sexually... then suddenly two players are gone from the game.

But "I never" participated in that aspect of the game! So there, that's my never.

Cincysundevil said...

Modigli-
Ends up in hooking up at the end of "I Never"? I need to play some drinking games with you and your friends.

JHD said...

Modigli, sounds like we've played the game the same way. Of course it's even more interesting when you play with people all of the same gender, and then 2 of them disappear...

The other way I've played is where all of you end up totally wasted because your friends all get out their latent anger and hostility with each other. One person usually starts by targeting someone and choosing the things they think will embarrass that person, and then it devolves into a free-for-all from there. Good times.

Lindsay said...

Hey, I've never smoked a cigarette either!

But cigars and shisha...well, that's another story ;)

Cincysundevil said...

JHD-
Isn't the point of the whole game to descend into a free for all?
Lindsay-
And here I thought you were an innocent SoCal girl living in London ... lol.

trix said...

i have never made an 'i have never' list.
meditating on one though ;)