Thursday, August 18, 2005

You Deserve What?

Jerry Springer’s show has been the inspiration of many of my blog postings. I’m endlessly fascinated with people who seem to have little or no regard for decency (which may explain why I always post about the Republican party). However, this particular morning in my usual morning gauntlet of waking up, moving to the couch to slouch for another 15 minutes, fixing a sandwich for my early lunch, getting dressed, and cursing myself for staying so long at a job that kills my spirit a little more each day, I always have the TV on.

In the midst of the usual “I’m fucking another low-life” episode, one woman came out completely unapologetic. She starts ranting about how she was fucking another man and was there to tell her current loser all about it. Apparently her current fuck somehow lacked that something necessary to be successful in the world today … I think it’s called a work ethic. Anyhow, she rants that she needs a man who will pay her bills, pay for her to get her hair/nails done, take care of her kids, and treat her as she deserves to be treated.

This makes me wonder: what does someone truly deserve? There are the usuals: dignity, a fair shot in life, food, shelter. But when did it become automatic for every hoodrat on the face of the earth to feel he/she deserves to be treated like royalty.

Don’t get me wrong: we all want to be spoiled. Hell, I’d love to date someone who decided that for no reason at all to stop by and pick up a couple of dozen wings and a nice cold six of Newcastle. And vice versa, I’d spoil her as well. I’d show up with some cake frosting for her and a copy of Love Actually (plus some boxed wine and turkey so I’d fall asleep ½ way through the movie … heh-heh). But when in the hell did getting your nails done become part of what you deserve????

I appreciate the fact that this chick has self-confidence despite her thinking that “manual labor” is the president of Mexico. Really I do. However, when that chick looks like she bit a brick and when her old man makes Bush almost look like a C+ student, what gives you so much cockiness? Did you cure cancer or AIDS? Did you compose the 9th Symphony? Did you write Don Quixote? Nope, you dragged your worthless ass from the bedroom to the couch watching re-runs of Laverne & Shirley.

Nope, this sort of arrogant asshole deserves to have to listen to Josh Groban albums over and over while eating Fazoli’s for 3 meals a day. These useless fucks deserve to be sterilized so that our future generations won’t have to worry about dumbing down the gene pool. These walking wastes of space should have to spend an eternity at Wal-Mart consuming moon pies, drinking Natural Light or Pabst Blue Ribbon, and having to act like they actually believe Toby Keith is an intelligent being.

We’ve become such a self-important culture that it drives me nuts. From the asshole who just walks to the front of the line at Salsa Fresh while you’re standing there double checking what you’re getting ready to order (yep; this has happened to me) to the jackoff driving in the left lane that suddenly decides he needs to make a right turn so he stops all traffic until someone lets him over. Society is out of control with these self-important fucks.

I guess I can’t even fathom saying that I deserve a woman with a body like Salma Hayek, the mind of Aristotle, loaded like Oprah, and the sex drive/naughtiness of Paris Hilton. I only deserve equal what I have done in my life. So at this point, I deserve the female equivalent of George Costanza. Do I deserve to be treated well? No better than what I treat my partner; anything more is a bonus. As with most things in life, the good guys are left behind while the unemployed fuck gets the gal. These sort of people are the reason why 50 Cent will sell millions while Common will only get critical praise.

13 comments:

Brookelina said...

You have so much more to offer than George Costanza. But then, so does a meatball sandwich.

When did people start thinking they were entitled to things without actually going out and earning them? Hmmmm...I'm thinking the Reagan administration.....

trix said...

preaching to the choir, hunny.

i just noticed the word verification thingy that i always screw up. what's a shicksa to do?

NML said...

Cincy, this was a great post. Those pidgeons or 'hoodrats' are not representative of the female species thankfully. I think it's a very pathetic attitude that they have. Personally, I'm not looking out for a man to come and do shit for me. I do it for myself. Not because I'm Ms Independent, just because it's not the role of a man to come into my life and be responsible for picking up the tab. These women have no respect for themselves. They deserve a makeover - maybe they should go on Extreme Makeover or something? ;-)

A. Estella Sassypants said...

I hate people.

Ruben said...

The post was impressive, but the photo nearly knocked me to the florr. You know I actually attended a taping of the Jerry Springer show once.

Cincysundevil said...

Brooke-
So wait a minute; are you saying that a meatball sandwich has more to offer than both Costanza and I?

I'm thinking you're right about the Reagan administration thing ...

Cincysundevil said...

Trixie-
If I could make this system just let you log in without making you do the word verification I would. I would love to help out a shicksa but as a goy, I'm in the same spot

Cincysundevil said...

NML-
Aaahhh, so true. I don't even know if Extreme Makeover would help. They can only makeover the outside, not the attitude. Only a good ass whipping or getting hit by a car can do that

Cincysundevil said...

Andi-
Me too. I'm in the wrong line of work; I need to be in a job where I can work on projects by myself

Cincysundevil said...

Ruben-
You should post about being on the Springer show!! That would be hilarious!! Did you get to stand up and make a comment?

Tish said...

Believe it or not, there are some women in the world who do want a nice guy. ;)

Tish said...

By the way, thank you for your nice remarks on my blog. How about moving to Tennessee? hehehe.

Anonymous said...

I must assume you also watch wrestling. Notice Hillary was at the WWE event. she knows her constituancy.